On May 21, 2006, some genius legal consultant bought a PowerMac G5.
Let me repeat that so you can all revel in its unbelievable stupidity.
On May 21, 2006, some genius legal consultant bought a PowerMac G5.
Intel Macs had already been available for approximately 5-6 months at this point, and the G5 was clearly on its way out the door. That being said, remember that every quote in this article is from someone who obviously knows nothing about computers in general.
The signs of doom were there on day one, but I ignored them. I pretended that I liked the one button mouse. I quickly started using click + command keys (and other keyboard shortcuts). I really missed the little scrolling wheel in the center of the mouse,” Bodine writes. “I noticed it was slow; I saw that stupid spinning colored wheel a lot. The Mac would hang up; the TV ads said Macs didn’t do that. The widgets were cool and snappy, but after a while I stopped using them. They were fun — for five minutes. I did like the Finder because it was quick in locating files, but it would turn up a lot of false hits. It was comparable to the Google Desktop searcher on my PC.”
Finder doesn’t locate files. Spotlight does. Every Mac comes with the Mighty Mouse, which has a left and right button and a scroll ball where the wheel usually is.
“What drove me nuts was that I would open Word for Mac and couldn’t delete files while I was in Word. There is no File | Delete option. So the documents took up space on my hard drive, until someone told me I had to find the document in Finder and then move it into the trash from there. This seemed stupid to me; I just wanted to highlight a file and tap ‘delete,’” Bodine writes. “Word files transferred from the Mac were missing pictures. PowerPoint files transferred from the Mac would lose their formatting. PCs and Macs are not compatible, regardless of what they say.”
So a program written by a third party is incompatible with a program on another operating system designed by the same company and we’re meant to take this as some incompatibility on Apple’s part? I must’ve missed something in the translation. Frankly, if you can’t find the file on your hard disk, you’re a moron. Secondly, if you manage your files from within an application, you’re an even bigger moron.
Bodine writes, “Doing a simple screen capture was an immense chore. On a PC you just press Alt and tap PrtScr. With the Mac I had to download and launch special programs to accomplish this simple task.”
Only because you didn’t read that For Dummies book you bought. The Mac has tons more functionality for screen caps than Windows has built in. Here’s the list of screenshot commands from MacDailyNews.com
Mac’s screenshot ability is unmatched by Windows:
– ‚åò-Shift-3 (Command-Shift-3): Take a picture of the entire screen and save as a file
‚Ä® – ‚åò-Control-Shift-3 (Command-Control-Shift-3): Take a picture of the entire screen and copy to the clipboard
‚Ä® – ‚åò-Shift-4 (Command-Shift-4): Take a picture of the dragged area and save as a file
‚Ä® – ‚åò-Control-Shift-4 (Command-Control-Shift-4): Capture dragged area and copy to the clipboard
‚Ä® – ‚åò-Shift-4 then Space bar (Command-Shift-4 then Space bar): Capture a window, menu, desktop icon, or the menu bar and save as a file
‚Ä® – ‚åò-Control-Shift-4 then Space bar (Command-Control-Shift-4 then Space bar): Capture a window, menu, desktop icon, or the menu bar and copy to the clipboard
‚Ä® – You can also take pictures of the screen using the Grab application (in the Utilities folder).
No special utilities required, idiot.
“I didn’t even bother with the Mac’s iCal or Mail, which required me to buy an @mac.com address. Instead, I went straight to Outlook for Mac. A lot of the software for Mac — such as AOL for Mac OS X — was dumbed down and missing may features of the current PC versions,”
Neither iCal nor Mail need a .Mac account. Outlook does not exist for the Mac, and anyone using AOL for the Mac and then complaining about anything being dumbed down is an idiot. That being said, AOL is not made by Apple, and therefore their “dumbing down” of software has nothing to do with the Apple OS. Of course, the schmuck gets worse:
“For me the killer was the Web browser. Safari simply cannot read Flash. It is, quite simply, a second-rate browser. I even called Apple headquarters and asked when a better version would be available and was told that Apple is in no hurry to improve it. On the suggestions of friends, I downloaded Netscape and Firefox, which were no better.”
Safari can’t run Flash?
Here’s a screen cap (taken without any special programs, btw) of YouTube, a site that’s predominantly Flash running inside Safari.
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As for Netscape, are you on drugs? No one uses Netscape. I use Firefox as my browser every single day on all platforms (Windows, Ubuntu Linux and Mac) and it works excellently. If, however, you read the next paragraph, you understand that the idiot who wrote this runs websites optimized for IE 5.5 or higher. In the year 2006, optimizing your site for one browser and not writing an open and standard site is not only bad business, it’s outwardly stupid. Here’s one of his much vaunted websites. Aside from looking like someone with twenty minutes of experience in FrontPage designed it, I see nothing on it that indicates it shouldn’t work fine on any other browser.
He also goes on to bitch about Typepad (not an Apple product), and his HP printer (not an Apple product, incidentally, I have one and it works absolutely fine).
My friend, you are an idiot. You deserve the virus-laiden buggy operating system MS Windows is. You deserve having to spend money on antivirus software. You sure as hell aren’t smart enough to read a book.
Even one that’s written for Dummies.
via MacDailyNews.com
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