If you need proof that we’re doomed as a society, I offer up this one for your perusal. Never in the history of mankind has our upcoming demise as a species been so obvious.
A woman sued General Mills because “The plaintiff, Janine Sugawara, alleged that she had only recently learned to her dismay that said ‘berries’ were in fact simply brightly-colored cereal balls.”
Recently?
To her dismay?
Has she ever seen a damn crunchberry in the produce section?
Luckily, a judge (who by rights shouldn’t have even given this case a hearing) laid the required smackdown upon this dope.
This Court is not aware of, nor has Plaintiff alleged the existence of, any actual fruit referred to as a “crunchberry.” Furthermore, the “Crunchberries” depicted on the [box] are round, crunchy, brightly-colored cereal balls, and the [box] clearly states both that the Product contains “sweetened corn & oat cereal” and that the cereal is “enlarged to show texture.” Thus, a reasonable consumer would not be deceived into believing that the Product in the instant case contained a fruit that does not exist. . . . So far as this Court has been made aware, there is no such fruit growing in the wild or occurring naturally in any part of the world.
Judge England also noted another federal court had “previously rejected substantially similar claims directed against the packaging of Fruit Loops [sic] cereal, and brought by these same Plaintiff attorneys.” He found that their attack on “Crunchberries” should fare no better than their prior claims that “Froot Loops” did not contain real froot.
This really is worse than the dopes that keep spilling coffee in their crotch and suing the coffee companies because their hot coffee is hot.